The Six Seconds model turns EQ theory into practice for your personal and professional life.
Emotional intelligence is the capacity to blend thinking and feeling to make optimal decisions — which is key to having a successful relationship with yourself and others. To provide a practical and simple way to learn and practice emotional intelligence, Six Seconds developed a three-part model in 1997 as a process – an action plan for using emotional intelligence in daily life.
This model of EQ-in-Action begins with three important pursuits: to become more aware (noticing what you do), more intentional (doing what you mean), and more purposeful (doing it for a reason).
Know Yourself
Clearly seeing what you feel and do. Emotions are data, and these competencies allow you to accurately collect that information.
Choose Yourself
Doing what you mean to do.
Instead of reacting “on autopilot,” these competencies allow you to proactively respond.
Give Yourself
Doing it for a reason.
These competencies help you put your vision and mission into action so you lead on purpose and with full integrity.
Know Yourself gives you the “what” – when you Know Yourself, you know your strengths and challenges, you know what you are doing, what you want, and what to change.
Choose Yourself provides the “how” – it shows you how to take action, how to influence yourself and others, how to “operationalize” these concepts.
Give Yourself delivers the “why” – when you Give Yourself you are clear and full of energy so you stay focused why to respond a certain way, why to move in a new direction, and why others should come on board.
You’ll notice we present the model in a CIRCLE – it’s not a list, it’s a process! The process works when you spin it, like a propeller moving a ship. As you move through these three pursuits you gain positive momentum!
“Under” the three pursuits live eight specific, learnable, measurable competencies. They’re measured through the Six Seconds Emotional Intelligence Assessment – or SEI. Here are the eight competencies – with definitions below:
| Pursuit | Competency | Definition |
| Know Yourself | Enhance Emotional Literacy | Accurately identifying and interpreting both simple and compound feelings. |
| Recognize Patterns | Acknowledging frequently recurring reactions and behaviors. | |
| Choose Yourself | Apply Consequential Thinking | Evaluating the costs and benefits of your choices |
| Navigate Emotions | Assessing, harnessing, and transforming emotions as a strategic resource. | |
| Engage Intrinsic Motivation | Gaining energy from personal values & commitments vs. being driven by external forces. | |
| Exercise Optimism | Taking a proactive perspective of hope and possibility. | |
| Give Yourself | Increase Empathy | Recognizing and appropriately responding to others’ emotions. |
| Pursue Noble Goals | Connecting your daily choices with your overarching sense of purpose. |
At the core, emotional intelligence is something to BE. By being more emotionally intelligent, smarter with feelings, you will more accurately recognize emotions in yourself and others. This data will help you make decisions and craft effective solutions to the “life puzzles” you face each day. It’s also important to put it in action – hence the verbs. The three pursuits – and the eight competencies – are actions.
To learn more about the model and how to use it:
An overview of the model including additional links excerpt from At the Heart of Leadership: How to Get Results with Emotional Intelligence (this book is an excellent resource for learning about EQ and the model in leadership)
See this video of our COO introducing the model
Order your SEI Assessment with a 1:1 debrief with a coach
Explore our blog and articles which frequently discuss different competencies – or search for the competency that’s of interest!